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I'm re-reading David McCullough's Truman. If we woke up tomorrow morning to find out that Trump had say, nuked North Korea out of spite, would anyone here be surprised? Shocked, perhaps. He's a narcissist who cares more about his own ego than the good of the country. Like most Republican politicians, he seems to think we're stupid sheep who will swallow any lie. I think the President is an opportunist who has surrounded himself with anarchists, intent on dismantling the Federal government, letting poor people die off and eliminating any advancements in human rights that women and minorities have achieved in the last few decades. Our goals were delayed, but never abandoned. Politics is short term, but keeping sane in the midst of chaos means taking the long view. Also, who wouldn't make it harder for the poor and middle class to survive and thrive. We could get through the Cheney Presidency and Bush's incompetence and in a short number of years we would have the opportunity to replace them with someone sane who could put an end to racist wars and invasions of our civil rights, and and push through policy changes for true equality that would help, rather than screw over large segments of the population. But deep down, I knew the country could weather him. Posted by barchan at 10:31 AM on ĭuring the Bush administration, I remember being very angry and feeling helpless. And then I went into the house and used my fidget cube because I have severe phone anxiety and it helps while I called my representatives yet again. I joke about screaming internally too but that was what was really happening.Īnyway. it was a moment of true despair and bewilderment and disbelief with all of the WTF and everything else coming together. I've been working really hard and taking action and volunteering and just fighting and somehow. Then I recognized the pain in my chest, which I haven't felt in more than a decade - it was the pain of a seriously broken heart, which is just so much 'I can't believe this is happening.' Everything that's happened in the last few months led up to that moment, I think, and even today it still hurts very badly. Where the hell did that come from?! How? But I felt so much pain and horror and despair at that moment I just couldn't deal with it.

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well, something about that small tidbit just sent me into a huge screaming fit into my car - punching the steering wheel, yelling, full on rage that was actually kind of violent and that turned into full on banshee wail weeping. But as I kept driving a Ray Lamontagne song line, ' all the wild horses tethered with tears in their eyes,' kept wheeling around my head. There's just EVERYTHING that we're hearing right now, and there's so much heartache for the people that are so seriously going to be affected by everything going on, including loss of life, and I've been so mad and sad about that. Yesterday on public radio I heard that fucknugget's new budget included a line item to round up wild horse herds on western public lands and sell them to foreign slaughterhouses in order to both save and make money. Take care of yourselves, and remember that the vivid sense of the wrongness and unreality of what's going on is a paradoxical, but in this case reliable, indicator of your own residual sanity. So here we are, such that 'the workaday events that command our attention are so big, so fantastic, so improbable that no one who isn't walking the parapet of madness can cope with what's coming down'-true enough words in the face of the seriously bad craziness of the times when they were written, but a thousand times more true now. All it took was for one sufficiently bold, insane individual to dream their horrifying dreams out loud, and the world accommodatingly reshaped itself in their image. I'm reminded of Harlan Ellison's comment that somewhere around 1978 or 1979 reality and fantasy switched places, and we've been living in a made-up world ever since.

Yeah, I've had to pause the political threads because they erode my self-control and I end up spiraling down the WTF drain for hours, which I can't afford to do given that I'm supposed to be writing a book at the moment.

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